October 15, 2018

The House with a Clock in Its Walls – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

No, this isn’t . Yes, it stars Jack Black. Yes, it’s a kids movie. Yes, it’s a lighthearted tale of mysticism and monsters coming to life and with almost deliberately shoddy CGI that evokes fondness for 90’s Nickelodeon-esque horror. But no, it isn’t Goosebumps 2. But I can understand why it […]
October 14, 2018

A Star is Born – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

Man, some movies are just bound to get remade until the end of time. Probably because general audiences don’t realize that the one they’re watching is a remake of a remake. Kind of like how  from two years ago was a remake of  from 1960, which is a remake of […]
October 11, 2018

In Case You Missed It – September 2018

Hey, geeks! So if you read last month’s entry on the indie scene from August, you’ll know that I’m already transitioning out of my focus on that aspect of the film market, mostly due to forces outside my control. And now that I’ve officially cut ties with MoviePass and my […]
October 10, 2018

Venom – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

A lot of people criticized Sony for their unabashed attempt at kickstarting a cinematic universe solely within the Spider-Man mythos a few years ago with  and . While the first was regarded as decent but uneventful, a lot of people lambasted the second for being overly ambitious and overstuffed with […]
October 6, 2018

A Simple Favor – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

This is kind of a tricky flick to pin down. I had trouble all through the marketing trying to make heads or tails of what  was going to be, and even now that I’ve seen it, I still don’t entirely know. Plot-wise, this is a tried-and-true mystery-thriller, but it’s built […]
September 26, 2018

Operation Finale – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

Careers are sometimes fun to track in Hollywood, especially when they don’t conform to any one subset or genre ad nauseam to the point that each and every project is just a carbon copy of the last á la Jean-Claude Van Damme or Katherine Heigl. And take for instance director Chris […]
September 24, 2018

The Predator – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

Hollywood just won’t let things die. And if they seemingly do, it won’t be for long. Granted, I don’t have high hopes for something like the Dark Universe after the train-wreck that was last year’s , but believe me, despite Universal’s silence on that front, they will not walk away […]
September 15, 2018

The Nun – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

I’m sure it’s pretty common knowledge that perhaps the quintessential prospect studios this decade have sought after are self-sustaining cinematic universes á la the one at Marvel. Yet aside from that example, there haven’t been too many follow-up successes, with DC continually failing to get any kind of a foothold and others […]
September 9, 2018

Searching – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

With the found footage film subgenre seemingly petering itself out to the point that modern audiences groan whenever a new one squeaks through, like with 2016’s  reboot, it perhaps being fitting that it ends where it ostensibly started. But perhaps a new spiritually similar trend is taking place, one that […]
September 6, 2018

August 2018 Indie Movie Digest

Well, here we are again, Volume 2, as it were, giving you a rundown on all the least relevant movies on your radar. Yet Volume 2 might also be the last volume, now that MoviePass has finally wised up – somewhat – and limited me to just three movies a […]
September 5, 2018

The Happytime Murders – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

At about this time two years ago, I and about everyone else in their twenties saw one of the most bonkers, hilarious, and disturbing movies in the history of animated cinema. I’m of course talking about , a warped, Pixar-esque, push-all-your-buttons comedy from the minds of Seth Rogen and Evan […]
August 28, 2018

Crazy Rich Asians – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

So, I suppose I don’t need to be the five-hundreth white guy laying out how culturally important this movie is for American audiences, specifically Asian-American audiences. I mean, the proof is in the pudding. Crazy Rich Asians is the first American-produced wide-releae film to feature a primarily Asian cast since 1993’s , […]
August 24, 2018

Mile 22 – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

Back in 2013, before there was , everyone’s favorite new patriotic, kick-ass American movie, was a little film about a true Navy SEAL operation set in Afghanistan called , starring Mark Wahlberg and directed by Peter Berg. Though not a monstrous success, it held its own fairly well enough during the […]
August 20, 2018

The Meg – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

Have shark movies jumped the shark yet? Excuse the pun, I simply couldn’t help myself, but every year or so it seems like another one comes along to try and take a chomp out of that niche market. And while we seemingly always get one that makes a sizable splash, […]
August 15, 2018

Slender Man – Spoiler-Free Movie Review

Ah… I remember Slender Man. Rather, I remember getting myself and my high school friends spooked over nothing as we culled the interwebs in search of everyone’s favorite creepypasta from 2011. Also there was a pretty decent yet frustratingly difficult computer game that pretty much everyone tried at least twice […]